- Music from Inception behind a report on Facebook stock. I die with laughter. SUCH DRAMA.
- Lying in a pool of sunlight. May never move again.
How do you calm your baby?
Published April 25, 2009 | 
I’m not sure if there’s something wrong with Maia, or if this is just a phase, but lately we’ve been having a bit of a rough time in this household with her. She’s still boycotting naps that last longer than 15 minutes, and at night she sleeps a maximum of three and a half hours before waking up for a feeding. The nighttime thing doesn’t bug me too much, because she’s miraculously staying asleep when I move her from my arms into the bassinet instead of being super-touchy about it all. And the lack of naps, you know, I could deal with it — if she didn’t need to take them. But she does, a fact which she demonstrates with red-rimmed eyes and falling asleep against my shoulder as soon as I pick her up to comfort her.
None of that’s actually the problem, though. The problem is that she has had an upset stomach off and on for about a week. She’ll be fine, happy and playing with us, and then just scrunch up her entire body and start screaming. It seems a lot like gas, only gas medicine doesn’t make it go away. I’ll feel her belly rumbling under my hand if I lay it against her stomach. Her face goes all red and she seems like she’s sobbing (when she’s not screaming). I can tell she’s hungry because she starts sucking at my shoulder or my hand, and when it’s my hand I can feel her tongue working — then she gets pissed off because that’s not what she wants. So I try to feed her, and as I tilt her body down and towards me, her face starts to get all screwy; by the time I put her to my breast, she lets out a wail, scrunches up her body once more, and starts crying. It’s heart-breaking. And, it means we start the entire process of calming her down all over again.
Generally, calming her consists of one or the other of us carrying her around the house, bouncing and “shhhh”ing her. Sometimes she won’t relax with me, so Chris will take her and she will. If carrying her around isn’t working, I’ll lie her down on the couch and try to play with her there. We also try distraction techniques: my mom bought a toy called Freddy the Firefly, and shaking him around will distract her for a few minutes so she relaxes. If that doesn’t work, making lots of noise with the rattle comes next. I’ll get out the playsilk, I’ll call the dogs over, anything at all to calm her down.
Since it’s been nicer outside, I’ve been taking her onto the balcony (and staying well away from the railing!), which seems to relax her a bit. It’s still a liiiiiittle chilly to keep her out there for long though, so back in the house we go.
But of everything we try, there is one thing that is guaranteed to calm her down (and if it doesn’t, well, we know we’re screwed until she just gets over whatever the hell is bothering her): we bring her into the washroom, turn on the sink for some white noise — and the shower if she’s especially fussy — and show her the shower curtain.
I posted this on my Facebook account as the “quintessential mommy pic” — no makeup, hair a mess, spit-up on my shirt, doing something absolutely mind-numbing to keep my baby happy. Then again, as her Babcia (my mother) said, that’s a pretty rockin’ shower curtain when you’re 10 weeks old.
LOL – I’ve had sooo many of those moments too!!!!!!!!! In fact… I look like that right now!
My son was exactly the same. He’d only sleep when it was dark and then only for up to 3 hours at a time. He would only take a daytime nap if he was cuddled in to my chest. I tried to nurse him when he was distressed, often with ear-painful highpitched screaming results after two sucks. I had almost convinced myself I wasn’t making enough milk and he wasn’t sleeping because he was starving but I knew we were having the right amount of nappies.
Sometimes a fridge teether or burp cloth would help his gums – teething from about 12 weeks
(. Other times ‘Tiger in the tree’ while rubbing his tummy would help him get any gas out that was too low for burping. But the main thing that turned it all around with us was us taking a snuggly nap together in my bed. Obviously I make sure he’s safe, can’t roll off or under pilows, etc and I lie down next to him and nurse him to sleep. I often doze off too but we manage to get a good 45mins – 2hour snooze. I haven’t mastered the art of leaving him to snooze by himself yet as if he wakes up and I’m not there he wails again, but if I’m lying right there, even if I’m reading or watching TV quietly, he often opens a sleepy eye to check where I am and nods straight off again. Obviously there are times when I can’t take a massive snooze and then I can either put him in the sling or for a walk in the buggy and he always takes a good sleep. Sounds to me like your DD might be over-tired too?
My LO is now 23 weeks and only really takes a couple of naps during the day and can sleep for about 5 hours at night. I think getting him taking real naps meant he wasn’t too tired to take a proper feed so could sleep longer without getting hungry, if you see what I mean. We have had off days but I think we’ve pretty much broken the cycle now. Good luck!
I love the shower curtain.
I haven’t figured out naps yet, usually she will only sleep on me. Sometimes I can put her in the swing or very rarely in her bassinet. I’m fine with her napping on me if it means she is sleeping and less likely to be grumpy later. I like to get a few things done around the house so its nice when she does sleep not on me. We cosleep at night so that isn’t usually a problem. She isn’t sleeping through the night but I rarely have to get out of bed.
As for calming the raging beast, I always offer her a breast first thing. Usually that will fix everything. When it doesn’t I have found that if I sing her the lullabys that I sing during our bed time routine she will 8 times out 10 calm down. I have to sing them a bunch and sway or rock her at the same time.
I can’t believe I forgot to mention that song thing in Lily’s 4 month update.
As for the upset tummy. Try some baby massage. There are a few rubs (for lack of a better word) that are suppose to help with gas.
A few deep breaths also help me.
Wow! It has been a while. I can’t believe how big she got! What a cutie. And yes, that shower curtain is FAB. It was gorgeous today, hope you got the chance to get outside a bit. I found that a couple of things helped when I was desperate:
1. A really long walk: You get to go out, grab a coffee (or whatever you like) and just let the sounds of the city or park or whatever lull her to sleep. Plus it’s good exercise.
2. On the not-so-nice days… get in the car and drive. We used to do driving tours of the city to get Peanut to stay asleep. Play some classical music on the radio and just let her drift off…
Hope you get a break soon! Sleep issues are the worst.
I love it. Alert Dr. Harvey Karp: there is a 6th “S”. Shower curtain!
I can’t believe that I’m going to say this, but I honestly don’t remember how we dealt with that. I know we had some similar times, and I was similarly frustrated, but I don’t remember what we did. A friend of mine told me that her doctor said there was a very short window of time when you could put a baby down for a nap, and it was about figuring out that window. I had a lot of success following the Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, but it’s not for everyone. Good luck!
I remember falling asleep in so many bizarre and uncomfortable positions when Grasshopper was an infant and only wanted to sleep on a human.
The best advice I can give is to remember that every single thing that you go through with your child is a phase. Whether it’s something lovely that you wish would never end, or something that can’t possibly end soon enough.
Thanks for dropping by!
Reading this, I was waiting with baited breath. What DOES calm her? What could it possible be?
Had a giggle when I saw the picture.
@Janice: Hah! Yeah, it’s mommy chic I think.
@PrettySprinkles: I definitely think she gets overtired and just makes it all worse on herself. I have co-slept with her for naps a few times, but I really like having the time to myself so I can blog, comment, try to do some work, etc. Fortunately she’s been better the last few days — I am wondering if the hummus I ate upset her belly :\
@Jinxy: Maia has this certain way of crying when she wants food, so offering breast first rarely works for us when she is not giving that cry. Funny, because if she just wants to comfort suck on something, she’ll choose my hand, or shoulder, or her own fist… anything close enough. I have tried some baby massage techniques, and I’ve discovered that if I pump her legs rhythmically while singing to her, she won’t squirm around and scream as much.
@Michelle: We definitely got out on Saturday & enjoyed the weather — yesterday as well. Maia seems to enjoy being outside quite a lot — she’d stop crying when we went out onto the balcony, start when I brought her back in. Unfortunately she did not want to sit in her own bouncy chair w/me beside her reading, so I was not very productive, but I’ll take that over an upset baby anyday
@Whitney: hah! I can’t figure out his damned side-lying position anyhow.. Maia will have none of it!
@Cara: Your comment made me think back, trying to remember bad times earlier. Funny, there is only one particularly horrible night that stands out in my memory w/Maia being around, and it was so bad because Chris & I got into a fight… while she finally slept!
@Natasha: sigh, it’s too bad that they grow out of the lovely things too.
@existere: I hope you, too, have a flashy shower curtain!
LOVE the “mommy pic.” I feel like I have spit-up on my shirt constantly…
Pingback: Now if only there were more hours in the day
Ah yes, white noise works wonderfully. We have used the hood range fan in the kitchen since our baby girl was born (she’s now 4 and a half months old). If you want to save water, you might find a fan works just as well.
I bounce while making a VERY loud SHH SHH SHH SHH SHH SHH SHH SHH sound.
Sometimes he prefers being held facing away.
The wrap ALWAYS works too. As long asi move while he’s in it.