Comments on: At least I’m not in denial

By: Marie

Marie — Sun, 21 Mar 2010 18:50:30 +0000

Oh yeah. It’s always harder to be ones authentic self (and feel good about it) when one is in comparison with others or trying to fit in. It takes a lot of bravery to go out and meet with total strangers, and then it takes some positive self-talk to work with the inevitable missteps. It’s all a learning process!

I used to not say a word around new people, but now, it’s often hard to get me to shut up, which has its own issues. I often come home feeling like a fool, just as self-critical and eager for connection, but shy and uncertain about making it happen. I’ve found it takes *practice* and being generously encouraging and forgiving with oneself. And as someone else said, it may take some time to find “your people” as well.

By: Funner

Funner — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 13:37:25 +0000

H.G. Wells, President Andrew Jackson, Ray Charles and Dizzy Gillespie (to name a few) were high school dropouts. Hundreds if not thousands of highly successful, talented, brilliant people have held “minimum wage” jobs.

Do not “label” yourself. These actions or states of being or jobs are passing moments, are parts of a whole – they are not YOU. And as long as you beat yourself up with silly labels and talk about yourself in such a disrespectful and demeaning light, then you have no chance of becoming that confident, amazing, self-assured person you were MOST CERTAINLY born to be.

When you feel bad for yourself, look at pictures of the families in Darfur or Haiti. You will be thankful for your job, you will be thankful that you ran away and survived – THRIVED even, you will be bursting with happiness that you have the CHOICE to sit with women and feel a tad out of synch, you will become the owner of your life again.

By: Myg

Myg — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 02:16:35 +0000

Dude, I would totally drive to Canada to eat steak with you and get my picture taken. Name the date, I’m bringing the boys with me. I apologize for your apartment in advance.

I always hate events like this too (by the way, what the hell was it?) I’m terrified to go to Blogher. I don’t even think I’m going (haven’t been blogging all the consistently, either, so, there’s that.) And hell, I am a paid public speaker!!! And I front a band!! How lame is that? I also feel like I have nothing to say, not funny enough, not smart enough. Definitely not young enough, not cool enough. Whatever. Why, oh why do we do this to ourselves?

You are the definition of awesome. Anyone who reads you knows that. If those people don’t, then their total loss.

By: Miranda

Miranda — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 04:22:48 +0000

Those are thoughts I struggle with as well. I love twitter, I love all the relationships I’ve made on twitter. And someday, I hope to meet all the wonderful people I chat with every day. On the other hand, so many seem to be smart, savvy business women, and I feel I pale in comparison to others’ accomplishments. I often wonder if I would choose the right clothes to wear and choose the right words to say.
Thank you for sharing!
PS…Maia has the BEST mama in the whole wide world. She has a mama who loves the fuck right out of her. She has a smart, beautiful mama who will stop at nothing to make sure her little girl has everything she needs.

By: tara

tara — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 19:57:20 +0000

i read this post yesterday but have been sitting on a comment — sometimes it takes me awhile, too, to come up with the words i want to say.

sometimes i wish i had the courage i see in these kiddos who have no fear, no anxiety, no self-consciousness. i hate that we learn these things.

sometimes being an adult is hard, and by that i mean being without the built-in communities (of school, of teams, of … not that those can’t be lonely places too). liking myself first, and believing i am likable is something i’ve had to work on as an adult.

it seems like you *are* starting on a path of self-worth and acceptance, merely by stating the words. and for that i commend you. *hugs*

By: thepsychobabble

thepsychobabble — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:40:55 +0000

Lady, I would totally take a picture with you. And then we could sit there and talk about how awkward and weird we both feel around large groups of people that we haven’t met in person before.
And you? Stop being so hard on yourself. You are a good mother, and have many, many qualities Maia will be proud of one day. When she’s done being a teenager. lol

By: Laura

Laura — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 04:38:24 +0000

We all struggle with our insecurities in social settings I think. I don’t think the woman meant to make you feel bad by her comment and was just trying to make conversation. Now I feel bad for not chatting you up more when we met Although I was feeling really nervous and insecure about myself that night lol

By: Karen

Karen — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 04:16:18 +0000

I can’t wait to get my hands on you at blogher – we are SO having our picture taken together. I am not shy but I still feel inadequate and self conscious of MANY of the same things you do. In fact I have a post scheduled for tomorrow that touches on this a bit. I think you’re fantastic. And I’m sad that you didn’t have the experience you deserved. But you will and your Maia has plenty to be proud of in her beautiful mama xo

By: Laurel

Laurel — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 04:05:13 +0000

Once upon a time there was a girl. She didn’t talk, she had one friend, she knew she was someone and knew she had things to say. She didn’t know how and tried to hide herself away. One day she made a big brave decision and decided to open her mouth and say something. She blushed and felt the worst she’d ever felt. She did theatre and created a character – those two situations were the most liberating of her life. That girl is a woman who is a speaker, teacher, often standing before crowds of hundreds. She makes people laugh and loves who she is and what she’s become. The moral of the story? She found her passion – working to empower others to feel fab in who they are. She created a business that does that work, because of awesome, terrific, amazing women like you who are brave enough to say I don’t know who I am, what I need to do, where I need to go or who’s going to support me. Just telling your story tells alot about who you are, your character and the strong sense of self you have as a woman. Hurray for your convictions and p.s. you are beautiful – just look at that photo!!
smooches and hugs
Auntie Laurel

By: Colleen

Colleen — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 03:55:53 +0000

I WANT MORE THAN ONE PHOTO WITH YOU AT BLOGHER.

I think you are beautiful. You are smart. You are funny. You can do anything you want and it’s ok if you haven’t figured out what you want to do yet either.

I find it much, much easier to talk to people through Twitter and IM, emails, etc. When write I get to edit. When I speak, I have to filter and sometimes the filter gets clogged. I usually don’t have too much trouble talking to people but I completely over-analyze everything after and DIE inside about how silly I must have sounded.

I seriously can’t wait to meet you in person. I love you to pieces.