I was unable to attend BlogHer this year. In fact, I’ve never attended, but for the past two summers I’ve sat here grumbling to myself as my favourite BlogHers shared the anticipation of attending. I’ve read the “What I’m Wearing” posts, the “Who I Want To Meet” posts, and the “I’m SO Nervous But I’ll Be Okay” posts.
Not once have I seen a post about BlogHer titled “I Can’t Wait to Steal Swag“, “I’ll Elbow Your Baby In The Head“, “I Have No Shame“, or “I Need Crocs So Badly That I Must Threaten Someone“.
BlogHer is the conference for women bloggers. That means you, the attendants, are representing those of us who can’t be there. To all of you who are awesome, classy (or maybe not), thoughtful, wonderful, hilarious, inspiring, indignant, and representing Toronto in style — thank you, thank you, thank you. Reading your posts and tweets about BlogHer has left me feeling positive about attending next year. I’m sending e-hugs to you, because you are the powerful, earth-shaking community that I am a part of.
The rest of you? I am furious. I like useful free stuff as much as the next person, but I value relationships and basic human decency over a fucking PEN or a sample of LAUNDRY DETERGENT. And don’t give me bullshit “I’m down on my luck, we’re broke, I really needed that swag” blah blah blah. I don’t buy it, and I don’t for a second believe that a free copy of a magazine is going to make your life that much better.
Maybe some people out there think it’s okay to compromise their integrity for swag. Maybe some people out there think a $200 BlogHer ticket entitles them to shove their way through a crowd with nary a mind for anyone “in their way”.
You represented my friends who did not get to attend. You represented my sister. You represented me.
And you devalued us.
Fuck you.
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I love you. No, seriously, I love you. Couldn’t say it better myself.
A fucking MEN.
Ooo! Great post!
I feel exactly the same way.
I love this post. No…..LOVE this post.
You, my dear, are awesome. The behavior of some of the attendees was absolutely appalling. This is truly the year that shame died!
Let me get this right…women shelled out $200 for a ticket, then paid for hotels and all that…then they fought over free samples of detergent and mags,claiming they were poor? WTF. Hey, if it were free Couch bags or designer dudes, I could almost understand but this is rediculous.
The accounts I’m reading show women at their worst. It’s discouraging & disheartening that so many get swept up into giveaways, swag & self-promotion and that they have no self-consciousness about how tacky their behavior appears to others.
And what is most galling is a defense I read that said other bloggers were just “jealous”…honey, those freebies you stuffed into your suitcase are all yours, I’m just worried about the people you stepped over to get it.
I wonder if mixed gender blogger conferences are this bad? I’d like to go to one if it was actually about blogging/writing & not marketing & selling yourself as a “brand” (yech!).
Definitely worth attending. Despite whatever crap was going on. Next year, go forth and schmooze and have fun!!
Wonderfully said!
Ugh.
For what it’s worth, I saw very little terrible behavior. People lined up for swag and it got a little pushy-grabby but I saw no stealing/shoving/etc. I was possibly too busy being like OH MY GAWD THE CROWDS.
there were some not classy broads there.
but there were classy ones.
i ignored the former and lauded the latter.
I completely agree with @mooshinindy (whom I got to meet and listen to in a session- I <3 her). BlogHer was what you made of it. That being said those people acting like middle school girls with no manners shoud be ashamed of themselves, but wait…they won't be. they don't know what shame is.
I haven’t been to BlogHer, but I have attended job-related conferences where people will do all sorts of stupid things for free sh*t. Are all conferences this way? I hope not.
It’s such a shame that a few classless people are giving us a bad name. There are always a handful of losers like that. But, really, it’s funny. I, mean, there was nothing I couldn’t have bought for $50 at Target.
oy. glad we did it the way we did it…
but still going next hear.
*snort*
All I can think to say is I agree.
Also, thank you.
Love.
100% dead on the money.
Somehow I missed most of the crazy drama. And somehow, the crazy is what everyone can’t stop talking about. There was a lot of fun and good and nice, which is why I went.
(Yours is the first blog I’ve seen with a blank for Twitter ID.)
I’m really surprised at the brouhaha that has erupted over this. What I would like to know is how many people who are railing about this bad behavior ACTUALLY saw it happen. Because no one I have talked to did. Yes there were probably a few bad apples (yes, I read the croc story) but come on people. Why are we making such a fuss because maybe a half dozen out of 1500 people behaved badly? Why is this indicative of anything other than that statistics are generally right. Were those that did this sort of thing reprehensible? Of course. But continuing to harp on it only draws more negative attention to what was a mostly enjoyable experience. I’m betting there were a lot more real stories about bloggers who were shitty to people than there were of swag stealing/hoarding/brutality.
Thanks for the the blog link above–I’m honored.
To Cara’s point: I witnessed some of this behavior firsthand. It was embarrassing; definitely not one of the prouder moments in women’s blogging history.
This was my first BlogHer and I have to tell you — the media were painting this story before it even started. The FTC regulations were brought up by the founders of BlogHer onstage on Thursday, the journalists were already taking about it, the sponsors were already prepared with their busloads of swag… it wasn’t the participants that created the fiasco you’re describing, though I can understand from the coverage why you’d think that. Instead, the whole event seemed like it was organized to deliver the Mom market to advertisers (understandable given the demise of huge, traditional media markets). I was interviewed by a journalist and am a former journalist and former journalism and media law professor myself. I point blank said to her — THIS IS NOT THE STORY HERE, DO YOU SEE THIS GOING ON IN THIS ROOM? but she was dead-set on only asking me questions about FTC regulations, sponsorship, swag, etc. Anyway… if you’d been there you’d have been able to see that it wasn’t the participants who did this… it was created before we arrived.
i’ve never been to BlogHer, and now that i’ve heard about all the nastiness, it kind of makes me not want to go. ever.
yall should be ashamed of yourselves…and you know who you are. PS: maybe BlogHer will change things up a bit to try to take such major focus OFF sponsor swag…somehow. maybe.
Yeah, seriously? Why the push for the swag? I don’t get it. It was just more crap to carry home. I was thinking about this as I was going through all the stuff to figure out what to take and what to toss in the hotel, and wanted to let sponsors know that NO ONE NEEDS ANOTHER FLASH DRIVE! but then I thought, don’t make these bags any more valuable because it is far too competitive.
Sadly the sponsors make the tickets somewhat affordable. I know $200 may not be affordable to some, but without those sponsors and their swag, tickets would be far more and far fewer people could go. So sponsorship is here to stay.
I mentioned in a post that the whole thing is what you make it and if you don’t care about the swag, you are far less likely to get caught in a melee for it. The simple fact is that whenever that many people gather in one place, two things happen. First, the statistical probability that you’ll meet an a**hole increases exponentially. Second, it’s easier to hide and feel like your bad behavior will go unnoticed, or at least that it can’t be pinned on you. Because seriously? no one seems to know who that Crocs person is and you can bet she’s not going to out herself.
I would not see the swag as a reason to stay away, just another fact to file away about your expectations.
Great site, can’t even remember how I got here, but I love it!
You, are awesome.
Also, thanks for the shout-out – you speak for many of us.