Girl Talk Thursday is Mommy Melee’s weekly event, and I really love participating, so here it comes: my thoughts on the topic of “Porn”.
I am mostly ambivalent when it comes to pornography. I’ll watch it — or not. It’s not a part of our sex life, that’s for certain. If I’m going to look at porn online, I’ll look for amateur stuff. I’m just not interested in bouffant blondes with plastic puppies (there’s your euphemism for “boobs” that starts with a p, dear Googler).
That said, though, there is one movie of this genre that must be watched and appreciated: PIRATES. Oh my gosh. This movie has some of the most hilarious lines ever uttered in a porno. I’m completely disappointed that I can’t find a list of quotes from it, but there’s great stuff like dirty pirate men cheering “GOD SAVE THE WENCHES” during an exhibitionist lesbian scene and an angry man snapping something about a burning vagina while he is trapped in a burning building. Sure, it has your typical “hot” lady stars and not necessarily attractive but certainly well-endowed men in it, but it also has an actual (sorta) storyline, GREAT costumes, and CGI special effects for some battle scenes. There’s actually an R-rated version of the movie where all the sex scenes are cut out.
Um. So yeah, we’ve watched that once or twice. It’d be a great flick to throw in if you were totally trashed (and kidless) with a few friends that you’re close to, because it’s just so damned funny.
And, I’m not one of those militant ladies that stomps around growling about how pornography degrades women. Do you know how much money these women make? The most famous ones make millions. And seriously? You’re never more powerful than when you have a man’s schlong in your mouth — teeth, my friends, teeth.
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There used to be a drive-in theatre a few towns over. When I was 18 or so, we used to go. Nothing more fun then backing the van into a spot, getting out the booze (18 was legal age then) and watching porno on the biggest screen imaginable. The bad thing was there were 2 screens. So, if you happen to bring the kiddies to the drive-in, and the happened to TURN around…they may not have gotten to hear what was going on, but they sure did get an eyefull. Always wondered how that was allowed!
Can’t remember the last time I watched it. Don’t miss it. I was wondering though why watching two girls go at it is fun, even though I am straight, and why watching two guys go at it just gives me the willies….does that make me anti-gay, in some weird way?
I’ve seen that Pirate movie. It was pretty good.
I have very similar views on porn as you do. I don’t watch it with my Hubby because we don’t need it but I have watched it with my ex or by myself in the past.
So three people mention Pirates today so that means we have to watch it.
Your teeth comment at the very end made me almost choke the goldfish I was eating. Good laugh! And oh the truth of it!!!
Gala’s last comment about girl-girl vs guy-guy – totally hearing you on that one!!!
Colleen: Yeah I noticed the reference to this Pirate movie too. Never heard of it or have seen it either. Will have to seek it out too.
Tatiana: I’m the same. I can take it or leave it and I’d rather search out some random amateur stuff then own anything.
That is so funny — teeth! ::teehee::
@Gala — that drive in theatre sounds… umm… interesting! lol.
Ok, I guess I never looked around at the other screens at the Drive-In. I’d never expect porn to be played there, of all places.
And it’s very funny that you should use Pirates as your movie reference. A friend of ours use to be in the video business and is getting out. He’s selling all his BlueRays and sent us a list in case we wanted anything. Most of them are standard everyday movies. Then the very last movie on his list: Pirates (XXX) LOL Just too funny.
Yeah, porn. I’ll admit that if I stumble onto it, I’ll partake for a minute, but for the most part, it’s just not me. The thing is, it’s so graphic that it takes all the fun out of it and makes it almost clinical. Where’s the sexy in that?
I’m so curious about this movie!! I’m not offended by porn…or much at all for that matter…I’ll have to check it out!
Apparently they made a sequel…