I’ve been avoiding looking at many baby “things” because I don’t know the baby’s gender yet. Since we’ll find this out on the 24th (pending that baby is cooperative!), I’ve finally given in to my urges and started looking around at Etsy, Babies R Us, Snugglebugz (a local baby shop) and various other online places. But it’s completely overwhelming to me; I don’t know what separates a good diaper bag from a bad one, whether I should look for unisex-type things so Chris doesn’t feel funny carrying around something that’s clearly girly (IF WE ARE HAVING A GIRL), or if I should ignore the thought of gender altogether and get something with the intent of using it for another kid. I don’t know if I actually NEED those baby furniture sets that come with a crib, changing table, and armoire with a hutch (we already bought a cute dresser @ IKEA that my sister will have to paint for me when she comes up in November ), or if I should just get a crib. Do I even need a changing table? Would it be easier to whip out a changing pad and just change baby wherever a dirty diaper happens?

And baby sling vs baby chest pouch vs baby carrier… what? How do you even figure out what works best without trying them all out?

Will my diaper bag spend most of its time open? If so, should I stop worrying about zipper closure vs messenger flap vs drawstring top? Was there ever a time you fumbled with a messenger flap in desperation to get inside that bag and just about blew your top?

When it comes to a baby registry, I’m totally cool with whatever people are able to provide in terms of clothing, blankies, books, etc … but does it make me a total bitch to want a “special” hand-made, personalized diaper bag that’s chic and stylish and costs $70 + shipping (like this one or this one)? Chris and I are ready to put out the cash for our own stroller and car seat, but we’d really like the family’s help with a crib — should I get a crib that’ll convert into a toddler bed or one that I can dissemble and toss into the closet for future babies? And again, the money & personalized thing; I know what the crib I want LOOKS like in general (and it won’t match my dresser, which is why my sister and I will do all sorts of baby room decorating when she gets here!), so I don’t want to leave it in someone else’s hands to decide, but since neither of the grandmas live close by, should I find someplace that sells what I want online, or is it alright for me to find it locally, at a shop that might not have a baby registry or even online purchasing?

What things am I forgetting? I know there will be so many little items that the baby will need and/or that will make my life easier, but I don’t know what they are. I need a checklist or something.

I’ll admit, a lot of this is probably just me being neurotic and strangely, sadistically satisfied that I have at last found a baby-related issue that I am worried about. So these questions are the ones that really matter:

What are some things you WISH you had known about baby-related gear? What would you change about the things you bought/received before baby arrived? Is there an item you couldn’t live without?

Please help!